I had started this thread to record the Loser experiences I was having everyday. I wanted to mock the illogical conversations I was running into.
Today is different. Today I am the joke.
Today I speak for myself. Today I speak of myself.
Well, not so much speak, as babble incoherently.
Why? Because my thoughts are out of control.
It is a rush in my brain.
It is, in fact, now a stampede that is killing every brain cell I have.
It was a rush a fortnight ago.
The feeling you get when you think you have found someone you can relate to. Ah!
But what on Earth made me feel that way? I have totally no idea.
I wasn't even drunk. I don't drink at all. Then why?
What wings was I flying on?
I got it in my head that I can trust someone I barely new with my deepest secrets.
Why? Because I never felt I could trust someone the way I did with this one?
No.
I think, in hindsight, I bloody blurted out everything because I am this rank moron who was having a field day proving exactly that to anybody who had any doubt about it.
Now I'm sure I am a bipolar all messed up in my head and the mania decided to show up at just the wrong time.
Oh! and did I forget to mention that I almost jeopardized the only meaningful relationship I have with anyone for the sake of my fantastic illusions? I also seem to have jeopardized the only friendship I found worthy of creating in a time so long, I can't remember.
What can I say?
There are some days in life one hopes and prays that they could turn the clock back and undo all that felt happy and good.
There are some days one is thankful for all the habitual miseries that piled up and kept this dejection at bay.
It has been one of those days.
I never imagined that I would see that day in my life when I would have preferred to stay a reclusive loser rather than a merry idiot.
Yet it was a rush and I let it blow me away.
And now it's rushing through my head and I'm rushing to keep myself together.
Holding on to straws that may keep my sanity from drowning to the depths of the ocean.
How does one forget the beauty of the moment?
How does one forget the absurdity of the moment?
How does one forget such a moment?
Is it possible to keep the beauty and let go of the absurdity?
It feels like, Life had been telling me all this time and I wasn't listening. So it gave me a lesson in "Do and Learn" before saying "I told you so".
Can't think of a bigger loser than myself at this moment.
I jinxed it by creating this blog.
Today is different. Today I am the joke.
Today I speak for myself. Today I speak of myself.
Well, not so much speak, as babble incoherently.
Why? Because my thoughts are out of control.
It is a rush in my brain.
It is, in fact, now a stampede that is killing every brain cell I have.
It was a rush a fortnight ago.
The feeling you get when you think you have found someone you can relate to. Ah!
But what on Earth made me feel that way? I have totally no idea.
I wasn't even drunk. I don't drink at all. Then why?
What wings was I flying on?
I got it in my head that I can trust someone I barely new with my deepest secrets.
Why? Because I never felt I could trust someone the way I did with this one?
No.
I think, in hindsight, I bloody blurted out everything because I am this rank moron who was having a field day proving exactly that to anybody who had any doubt about it.
Now I'm sure I am a bipolar all messed up in my head and the mania decided to show up at just the wrong time.
Oh! and did I forget to mention that I almost jeopardized the only meaningful relationship I have with anyone for the sake of my fantastic illusions? I also seem to have jeopardized the only friendship I found worthy of creating in a time so long, I can't remember.
What can I say?
There are some days in life one hopes and prays that they could turn the clock back and undo all that felt happy and good.
There are some days one is thankful for all the habitual miseries that piled up and kept this dejection at bay.
It has been one of those days.
I never imagined that I would see that day in my life when I would have preferred to stay a reclusive loser rather than a merry idiot.
Yet it was a rush and I let it blow me away.
And now it's rushing through my head and I'm rushing to keep myself together.
Holding on to straws that may keep my sanity from drowning to the depths of the ocean.
How does one forget the beauty of the moment?
How does one forget the absurdity of the moment?
How does one forget such a moment?
Is it possible to keep the beauty and let go of the absurdity?
It feels like, Life had been telling me all this time and I wasn't listening. So it gave me a lesson in "Do and Learn" before saying "I told you so".
Can't think of a bigger loser than myself at this moment.
I jinxed it by creating this blog.
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